"I want to get promoted." Do you, really?

Many conversations that I had with my team members as their manager was about them getting promoted. The general sentiment of these conversations was - I am eligible for a promotion or I earned the promotion or everyone else has been promoted but me. And when I asked - "so, why do you want the promotion?" - the first response is money and then I hear crickets... I've almost never heard a compelling reason that anyone has provided me for why they want to get promoted.

I don't ever remember having a conversation with my bosses about my own promotion. I did get promoted a bunch (without asking) and then I didn't get promoted for a decade(maybe because I didn't ask enough - I will never know).

When I had conversations with people who did get promoted, there weren't any memorable stories about impact or fulfilment. In fact, soon after promotion, most people would start complaining - the raise was not enough, the expectations are not clear, the job is the same - just the title differs, there new responsibilities are overwhelming.

It got me thinking about promotions. Why do we want it so much and why does it not make us as happy as we believe it should?

We want to be promoted because we’ve been taught that it’s the proof we’re doing life right - that we have arrived, we have made it. From childhood report cards to corporate performance reviews, success is measured in external milestones and a promotion is the professional gold star.

But once we get there, the reality often feels different. Promotions often come with more responsibility but less autonomy, more visibility but fewer boundaries, and more pressure but not necessarily more meaning.

It’s not that promotions are bad. It’s that we often pursue them without asking: What does this really give me — and what might it take away? Oftentimes, what we’re chasing is not the role itself, but what we think it represents: recognition, security, success. And that can be a trap.

Research from Harvard Business Review and the Center for Creative Leadership highlights that many professionals experience a disconnect between career advancement and personal fulfilment.

So before you chase the next rung on the ladder, ask yourself:

• What does the promotion actually mean for me?

• What will learn?

• What am I willing to trade off?

• How much of my identity is wedded to this promotion?

• What will not getting promoted mean for me? Why?

• What else might growth look like?

  
  

Coaching can help you pause long enough to explore these questions honestly. To strip away the noise of expectation and tune into what you truly value.

Because the goal isn’t just to go higher. It’s to go where you thrive and thrive where you go.

If you’re standing at a career crossroads and want to explore what comes next—not just what looks good on paper—let’s talk.